COVID-19 Shelter-in-Place: Day 1

On Monday night, Officials in Bay Area counties ordered residents to shelter in place for the next three weeks in order to dampen the spread of COVID-19 in our communities. You can be cited and fined, or even imprisoned, for leaving your house for non-essential activities.

Day 1 has come and gone.

On one level, it feels like I’m living through a significant point in history. At least in the limited 3-4 decade span of my lifetime, the events happening today are totally unprecedented. Some countries are on complete lockdown (Italy, France, Spain). Many have closed their borders. In the U.S., a panic run on toilet paper. Everything is canceled.

This past Sunday was the first time I’ve attended a table meeting where multiple clusters met in separate locations but remained connected via web conferencing software. It was inspiring to see each cluster when they popped up on screen as folks took turns speaking/reading. But I also couldn’t shake the feeling that this was set up to be a dress rehearsal for the Great Tribulation.

On another level, sheltering in place felt like my normal routine. I work from home frequently enough that current events haven’t disrupted my lifestyle (except for the eating out part, but now I DoorDash). I’m set up to work anywhere with Internet and my home office chair was designed for hours of sitting. Sure, I am now obsessively washing my hands every time I come back in to the apartment and I loathe to touch any doorknobs, but overall, I’m one of the fortunate ones whose life still has a semblance of normalcy.

It probably also helps that I made my preparations three weeks ago before all hell broke loose. The positive impact on one’s mental state from being food/supply secure cannot be underestimated. (No, I didn’t overstock, but I did make sure I have enough to tide me through.)

We’ll see what happens in the coming days.

Age Is Just a Number

It always surprises me when I reminded that I’m already solidly in my mid-30’s. Because I don’t feel my age. Okay, maybe except in the cases of delayed onset muscle soreness after a modicum of physical exertion.

Maybe it has to do with living in a college town and my working from home setup often involves camping out in cafes frequented by students. Or maybe because I still have a very college-like lifestyle sans the classes and studying and parties. Or maybe because I still partly retain the awe and wonder of a child, so when you average it out, I end up somewhere around 28 years old.

Asians don’t raisin, and my parents have passed down some pretty good genes. But when I look more carefully in the mirror, I notice subtle etchings of crow’s feet and the slow but evident proliferation of sun spots.

And it brings to the forefront a stark recognition of how much time has already gone by.

Don’t Share These Ideas with Your Parents

When I was younger, I had all these creative ideas…which, without exception when told to my parents, would result in my being scolded. I would share the schemes with the belief that they would be amusing, or would at least be a fun thought-exercise.

Instead, what I received were lectures. Perhaps my parents were genuinely concerned that I would somehow grow up into a criminal mastermind.

Below are two such ideas, one from the past and one inspired by more recent events.

Disclaimer (in case this is really necessary): Obviously, these ideas are highly illegal and I am not encouraging anyone to actually implement them.

Idea 1: What if you had interchangeable license plates, controlled by a simple button on your steering wheel? Any time you’re about to run a red light, you just push the button and the license plates would swap (either sliding over or rotating). Once you’re clear of the intersection, you push the button again, and you’re back to your legally registered plates. If there were any traffic cameras, all they would record would be your faux-plates.

Idea 2: Open a repair shop that replaces automobile windshields and windows. Take late night strolls and smash two or three car windows, spacing them out at least two blocks apart. Change neighborhoods each time you go out and make sure your routes are random walks. You get your daily exercise and you drive business to your shop (well, they may not necessarily come to your shop, but it does expand the market).

Core

What is my core?

Was talking to KS about who we are at our core, about what’s been consistent for us since we were younger. The first thing that came to mind for myself was “curious.” But then after that, I realized that I’m not entirely sure what exactly my core consists of. I mean, there are a lot of things that I think are me, but then upon reflecting on my life, there are a number of instances I could point to that would seem to negate what I might think is my “core.”

KS offered “opinionated.” I agreed.

So later, I thought more about it while I was in the shower. It was hard. There were a lot of contradictions. What is learned, what is habitual, what is inherent? What is really me? Or is it all me?

Being Around

Mom is weighing her luggage for her flight tomorrow night. I feel kind of bad that I haven’t been altogether there. I mean physically I have been, but besides that.

Although she just said that she was happy that I’ve been around so much. I don’t know. I guess there is something to say for just being there.

Her luggage is overweight – she has way too much stuff she wants to bring back, most of it from Costco.

Ugh. Head still hurts.

Stroll

Took a walk with mom around the perimeter of campus. She stopped to take a photo of pretty much every building we passed, including random frat houses. With most everyone still gone on vacation, the streets were fairly quiet. Which made for pleasant stroll. Calm, tranquil, breathing in the fresh air. I like the environs of Berkeley – the non-dirty parts. I think I’ll miss it when it’s time to go.

Had my brother pick us up on North Side and went to Angeline’s. Oh the delicious crisp of those hush puppies…

Ugh. Head is pulsing. That’s what happens when I stay up.

Appetite

Currently typing this on a Wii U. The going is a bit slow. Probably because it wasn’t designed for blogging.

I think I do a lot of thinking and realizing when I’m walking around looking for lunch. Today, I realized I haven’t had much of an appetite. Wasn’t that excited about the prospect of trying something new. It’s not that I don’t get hungry (although once in a while I really don’t feel like eating); I think it’s more like I don’t care so much what goes into my mouth. And I think this extends even beyond food.

I feel like I’m just going through the motions of life, doing what I need to do (eating, working, etc.), but not that much alive. Normally I’m full of excitement and appreciation for the little things around me, but it felt like the vigor of life has been replaced with a kind of dull apathy.

Or that’s what I thought. The secretary of the other firm we sublet from was leaving for another opportunity, so she bought a box of mini-cupcakes for the entire floor. There were all different kinds, and I grabbed a red velvet. I ultimately had three, but there were still so many sitting around, and I’m sure there were at least four hours between my first and second. But oh man, cream cheese frosting is so yum. Yum yum yum. And in that moment, I realized that I still have an appetite, no matter how much it’s been subconsciously suppressed. Maybe I just have a strong inherent flair for life. Or maybe it’s because there’s something called resurrection.

Regardless, I still need to know more His resurrection life.

I still want.

Hebrews 12:2

Author and Perfecter of our faith, I look away unto You. I trust in Your sitting down, though I would like to see what You see.

There’s a knot in the pit of my stomach. Earlier, it was a sinking in the chest. And it does not feel good.

It helps that You have a golden girdle.

Day 1 of 2013

Woke up today at 6:40am. Wished I could stay in bed longer.

Asked my brother if he could drive today instead, for the safety of my family, and pretty much passed out in the passenger’s seat for the two hours to the aquarium.

Realized I forgot to reinsert the SD memory card into my camera; thus, rendering it useless. Lame. At least I had a smartphone, so I decided to Instagram.

I wanted to Instagram everything. But there was some consciousness of restraint for the sake of others’ news feeds.

Aquariums are soothing; the fish glide so effortlessly through the water. I guess the rhythmic water music helps too. Jellyfish even more so. I think I could have sat there by myself in the dark, and just watch the jellies pulse and glide all day. There’s something entrancing about it. Makes me want to get myself a tank of jellyfish.

So a new year.

Lord, grow in me this year. Further develop my faith, and may I see Your governing vision. Cause me to really know what it means to experience and enjoy grace. And genuinely be for Your building.